Forgotten Insects - The Rise And Fall Of Altered Images

The birth of this band from the wee darkest depths of Glasgow happened purely by accident in around 1980. Scruffy school mates by the strangest names of Tich, Tinny, Johnny and Caesar were struggling to get away from the school dances and town halls, getting paid peanuts to sweaty, drunken crowds of kids whose ears were just about as in tune to the music as the band were.

It was only when the older brother of Johnny, by the name of Gerry decided that his girlfriend at the time's little sister Clare, had a fairly pretty singing voice and that a girl fronting the band might give the guys a bit of a boost. It is these life changing moments that one only hears about in the music industry (like the timely meeting of Lennon and McCartney at a village fete) that bring fame and success all rolled into one. Fate, as we call it seems to strike at the strangest times. These split second occasions don't happen anymore, or at least, the industry doesn't allow for them to happen any more due to 'bands' and music being mass produced, like a conveyor belt. This is an album review on one of the last bands not to have been produced in this historical and fatalistic way. Some kids got together quite naturally and the rest was history.....

This album is not just another 'hits' album. Its extensive in the fact that we are also introduced to some newer tracks. What does happen here is that we are taken on a journey around the career of Altered Images. Since Miss Grogan has gone on to what a lot of us would call, better things on Sky Channel, VH-1, she hasn’t needed to fall back on any royalties from her songs. However, I understand that she couldn’t resist temptation and had a solo single out this year called 'Love Bomb.'

In the early eighties they only released three albums. 81' Happy Birthday. 82' Pinky Blue and 83' Bite. In this time they only released eight singles. The highest position and perhaps their most famous single, 'Happy Birthday.' This one reached number 2 in September of 1981. (It was kept off the top slot would you believe by 'Green Door' by Shakin Stevens.) 'Happy Birthday', and other hits are featured on this album. An album that, in my opinion is worth scrapping the rest for and just reaching for this one off the shelf instead.

The album starts with a short 'intro' not unlike Cyndi Lauper's album, 'A Night To Remember' when all that can be heard is a scratchy record also at the end of the album and we think that our stereo is on the blink. This intro for Altered Images is a simple glockenspiel (and yes, I did have to look that word up) with Clare repeating 'Happy Birthday' in the distinctive tune. We are immediately struck by the clearness of her voice. She is pitch perfect and her voice echoes like tiny bells. Actually, listened to it carefully, it sounds as if this has been recorded again for the release of this very album. Her voice is still spot on, yet sounds a little older. The same intro was used on their first album 'Happy Birthday' and also used again to close the album.

We are then lead into there first hit, and not a memorable one, but this album has been produced as a tour through the bands chart history. 'Dead Popstars' has a title that would sound at home on a Smiths album, and at only the highest position of sixty seven, spending only a fortnight in the charts, we are not holding too much hope out on this being a stormer of a track to listen to. Even so, this band did, eventually take the world by the balls and became one of the greatest British bands to find fame in less that two years. This is track 2 on our album here, and it starts with a rather dull and depressing riff in flat. Their heaviest influences at the time when they were finding their feet was Siouxie and the Banshees. Little surprising really as this is the band that we think we are actually hearing. This influence has a strong presence within this track. It also paints the picture of the time. Released in March 1981, it was towards the end of the mass punk era and the picture is clear. Clare uses her untamed voice to curl up at the end of every note like a childlike impression of Toyah Wilcox. It also has distinguishing themes of Depeche Mode. It shows all the markings of a new band trying a sound that reflects those of their contemporaries at the time. The lyrics are dull and interesting, and possibly not the best way to open album, but I guess Altered Images are well established enough to throw an awful early single in the knowledge that the listeners aren't going to turn it off immediately.

Track three is the very intriguing 'Insects' and we feel that Clare really has turned into one by the way she uses her voice to enhance her lyrics. We are starting to hear the Altered Images we know and love come peeping through. The band aren't creating so much noise in this track. We can distinguish instruments. We can hear the beginning riff more clearly. The band now feel that they are working together rather than competing against each other in the previous track. Its also a better stab at the chart. We are surprised to learn that this wasn't released. It appeared on their first album 'Happy Birthday' released in September 1981. This was supposed to be their finest album, but that was debatable. Their best work was yet to come. Still 'Insects' is a humorous tune especially the hissing Clare tails off the track. You can imagine her bending low down to the crowd enhancing her voice as she twists herself.

Track four is the better known 'Love and Kisses'. We are hearing true Altered Images. This was also featured on their first album. The drum effect throughout the track puts the listener in mind of and early Adam and the Ants track. This tribal usage of drums were popular with most bands in the early eighties. It is well rounded theme to the era of the time. We had left the punk era behind now, and with all music at the time, it reflected that. Perhaps the one track that could be the answer to the question of their immediate success was ‘Happy Birthday,’ and was here that they entered commercial stardom. The band create a pop style now by breaking away from their punk roots, to simply make money. Clare was famed for bouncing and jumping her tiny frame around the stage. For this track she simply couldn't keep still. The lyrics are catchy and its a tune that has been played over and over again for millions once a year, every year. The single stayed a massive seventeen weeks in the chart. The album, released in the same month, was only given its extensive credit simply on the strength of this record being so popular. Chosen as one of the most perfect party records of the decade with its jingling guitar riffs and rolling quick drum beats, regardless whether its anyone's birthday or not....

Incidentally, the album was produced by Steve Severin, also the producer of Siouxie Sioux. So we can understand the doom filled desperation sound of the forgettable ‘A Days Wait..‘ The lyrics are not of now what we see as Altered Images style, and the tune is rather tuneless. It was released in 1981, but thankfully, didn't do anything.
Perhaps we were relieved with songs like 'Small Without Me.' By the sound and usage of synthesiser, we can gather that it is a recent track, although I have not record of this track at all. All I can decide is that its one of those tracks thrown into a 'hits' album to startle the listener. It starts with a tambourine fuelled riff that sounds rather like Lenny Kravitz. The mono radio effect is used on Clare's voice like and this is also used with her as she also sings backing vocals and its a taste of Altered Images could still cut the grade if they were still releasing singles today. Her voice sounds fuller, more mature and the slightly 21st century indie sound suits the whole band.

‘I Could Be Happy,’ is simply a mirror of 'Happy Birthday' in its style, beat and not far away from the same melody but perhaps slightly flatter. We also hear a choir effect to wrap the track in something that doesn't sound so enclosed. One gets the feeling with some of their tracks that its rather like standing in a life with the band and Clare performing in between floors. Released in December 1981, and even uses some chime bars to make the track sound seasonal, it did reach number seven in the UK charts, hanging around for twelve weeks in total. Not surprising that in 'See Those Eyes' and we back to commercial hits making time. Now we are hearing the definite sound that was unmistakeable Altered Images. Clare's vocal is an octave lower which allows her lyrics to come over clearer. The problem with their tracks to this date is that Clare's voice had been stretched to its limit therefore understanding her lyrics was difficult. Featured on the 1982 album, 'Pinky Blue' it was also a fairly successful hit released in March of the same year and attained the position of number eleven. It wasn't of the same calibre of 'I Could Be Happy', it had something missing from the usual releases. Perhaps, it was after this single, the band came to a decision to change the format and the style of their records. A sort of, move with the times, if you like. It was hits after this time that took on a whole new sound.

Also with the titled track of the same album, 'Pinky Blue,‘ it does at first, sound a little too bubblegum and leg warmers to the listener and we panic at the thought of Altered Images turning into Barbie. It open with a futuristic sound of lazar guns. In all honesty, if Altered Images hadn't done this track, then Transvision Vamp would have snapped it up in quick time. Clare Grogan is certainly bubblegum but more fishnets in need of some repair rather than leg warmers. She waters down her impression of Toyah but sounds more Tracy Ullman. It didn't do much for the increasing fast repertoire for Altered Images, only achieving a poor number thirty five.

Track eleven is the titled 'Forgotten', and this first opening beats sound half nicked from New Order's 'Blue Monday' In fact, if they had hired a female vocal, this is what they would have come up with. Clare, like many female fronting leads of the time actually couldn't sing. It was a time when an actual voice was not required. It wasn't long before we heard 'West End Girls' completely talked through, although brilliantly by The Pet Shop Boys. Was this the style they were now toying with? No, the next track spelled a new beginning, although a short one, but also opened them up to a whole new audience, and in my mind, had finally landed them fair and square on the map of famous British pop.

'Don't Talk To Me About Love' threw a number seven at them, but should have done better. Within this track we hear a tune, Clare singing and good backing vocals, and a cute guitar riff that could be whistled if fast enough. Released on the 19th of March 1983, it really couldn't have got any higher. Its release was purely bad timing. Unfortunately, they were forced to remain at number seven due to 'Total Eclipse Of The Heart' by Bonnie Tyler being at number one, one month, then 'Lets Dance' by David Bowie the next. The pressure to release anything better than that was far to high for the student band from Glasgow. These were old pros sitting at the top, and there was no room for Altered Images. But, on the other hand, what did the chart matter when you had best selling albums and one of your greatest fans was John Peel, who followed them overtly. He once said '...say what you like about Altered Images, they could rip the s**t, both on record and no stage, out of a lot of bands of that period.' It was true, Altered Images did and yet laid the path straight for future bands like, The Primitives, Garbage and Transvison Vamp. Grogan had made jumping around and acting girlie alright. It wasn't cool anymore to be old and mysterious all heavily made up. It was 'in' to be acting like its your twelfth birthday, wearing rolled up baggy trousers and brightly coloured beads around your neck. She, above all represented other kids walking down the street. So in the next song, ‘Love To Stay, which is
slightly Human League in their latter day theme, is cured from all the bouncing and throwing oneself around the room knocking the coffee table over. Its thoroughly produced on a keyboard, and we hear no U2 guitar take offs. Clare is strangely at home with this melodic enchanting track. It sooths and irons out the creases formed by new romantic punk.

'Change Of Heart' is where we are introduced to pretty awful sounding synthesisers sounding like an end of pier dance organ. With lots of arrs and ooos, its a little sixties sounding, somewhat retro, not unlike the style that Diana Ross tried to produce with 'Chain Reaction'. Again, we can hear that they were prime influences to Transvision Vamp. We now start to see that pop history is just a chain of events and sounds.
Moving on to 'Bring Me Closer' is, and I must say, a very well worked disco track. Lots of clapping and not short of a roller disco classic. Its Sister Sledge if you like. Madonna could have pinched this for 'Confessions On A Dance floor.' It contains cool sax breaks and swaying violins, fresh off Love Boat. Its a little on the cheesy side, but as I said, works, but please, Altered Images, don't do another one! 'Las Vegas Lullaby' is a shock to the system. Its simple and sweet but not sickly with its tinkle tinkle bells and slide guitar. Its Clare being rather serious for a moment. After all, she has matured in years as well as voice. Unfortunately, this is the first we've heard it.

The album finishes with the statutory awful, time filler mix of some hit we've already heard on the album. This time its 'I Could Be Happy' that they've ruined by putting some funky beats to it. Its too heavy on the 'Blue Monday' feel. If I wanted to hear that, I would have reviewed 'Substance 1987'. The intro goes on for far too long, then jut when you think you actually might be hearing the track for real, it goes back into a loop of hefty intro again. So please, don't make Clare sound like Jive Bunny. I couldn't take anymore.....

In short, this album makes you stop and think. Should we just cast the CD to one side and perhaps play it again when there nothing else better to do? We've just cast aside someone's life there! These youngsters dedicated their lives to making music. With pop so soulless and cold today, it can make you one minute into an overnight sensation, then drop you like yesterdays fish in the morning. At least Altered Images lasted a smidge longer than that…


Tracks included;

Happy Birthday intro
Dead Popstars
Love And Kisses
Happy Birthday
A Days Wait
Small Without Me
I Could Be Happy
See Those Eyes
Pinky Blue
Forgotten
Don’t Talk To Me About Love
Love To Stay
Change Of Heart
Bring Me Closer
Las Vegas Lullaby
I Could Be Happy (MR mix)
Happy Birthday outro.






©mduffy 2006